Karina has taken up Circuit Training to get herself fit. I think you'll get a kick out of it or perhaps exhausted from just reading about this hobby.
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Circuit Torture…er Training
By Karina Fabian
Here’s a simple fact about me: I am a sedentary creature. Inertia and I are best buds, and as a writer, I’ve got more push to keep my fingers moving and my butt stationary in the chair. I’ve kept meaning to get in shape, and I even took haidong gumbdo lessons (Korean sword martial arts), but a couple of hours swinging the sword each week just didn’t do the trick. Even worse, I am an indifferent cook who does not much care to give up her sweets or go on a diet of any kind, no matter how popular. So it’s no surprise that at 45, I weighed 169 pounds and had the muscular consistency of a bag of pudding.
That’s why, in January 2013, I took up a new hobby—circuit torture. The premise is easy: you put your body through unnatural movements bearing as much weight as you can for as many repetitions as you can until you make noises similar to those of childbirth…but only for a limited time, after which you move on to some other new and unusual punishment. In order to make your Experience of Pain complete, you alternate exercises with aerobics activity. Since running gives me shin splints, my cardio pain device is the Jacob’s Ladder. Imagine, if you will, a treadmill made of rungs and set at a 45 degree angle. The faster you climb, the faster the rungs move out from under you. Kind of an analogy to my life, come to think of it. It doesn’t kill my shins—after all, circuit torture is supposed to hurt, not damage—but my muscles feel every session!
The owner of this demonic health club is Ryion Butcher, who recently won not one but three awards at his first bodybuilding event. He’s got the perfect personality for a personal torturer: upbeat, competent, and always glad to push you further. He’s even got the perfect laugh: encouraging, without belittling. You can barely hear the Bwa-hahaha undertones. I think there must be a school for it. (Seriously, though, he’s a terrific guy, willing to work with you to modify the workout if needed, and he doesn’t push me nearly as hard as I push myself.)
Why would I choose such a diabolical establishment? Inertia. I’m a lazy person. If I’m sitting, I’ll stay sitting, so if I want to work out, I need to do it when I’m already up and about. The gym is in my neighborhood, on the way home from dropping the kids at school. I drive by it every morning, so why not just stop in and get the torture done? I’ve gone 5 days a week every week since I joined.
I still don’t eat the best, though I’ve cut down on sweets and sodas, but as of the 3-month point, I’d lost 14 pounds and 23 inches. Plus, I’ve got muscles again. I won’t be participating in any competitions, but I don’t completely wobble like a Jell-O mold anymore.
Plus, it’s fodder for stories. Someday, I’ll have a villainous personal trainer with a gym of EVIL. The Jacob’s Ladder will be suspended over the piranha tank. Of course, you can stop any time you like…
Looking Good! Bwahahaha!
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Winner of the 2010 INDIE for best Fantasy (Magic, Mensa and Mayhem), Karina Fabian has imagination that takes quirky twists that keep her--and her fans--amused. Nuns working in space, a down-and-out Faerie dragon working off a geas from St. George, zombieexterminators—there’s always a surprise in Fabian’s worlds. Mrs. Fabian teaches writing and book marketing seminars, but mostly is
concerned with supporting her husband, Rob Fabian as he makes the exciting leap from military officer to civilian executive, getting her kids through high school and college, and surviving daily circuit torture…er, circuit training. Read about her adventures at http://fabianspace.com.
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When Grace’s life is in danger, Vern will do just about anything to find a cure—
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Blurb: Being a private detective in the border town of the Faerie and Mundane worlds isn’t easy, even for a dragon like Vern. Still, finding the wayward brother of a teary damsel in distress shouldn’t have gotten so dangerous. When his partner, Sister Grace, gets poisoned by a dart meant for him, Vern offers to find an artifact in exchange for a cure. However, this is no ordinary trinket—with a little magic power, it could control all of mankind. Can Vern find the artifact, and will he sacrifice the fate of two worlds for the life of his best friend?
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